Thursday, November 15, 2007

Keeping it real

Some days are like yesterday. God speaks to me clearly and I know why I am here and I get a bazillion things done but still find time for prayer and friends and go to bed tired but happy.

Some days I want to go back to bed and start over.

Some days I want to go back to bed and stay there.

I've got this idea that I oughtn't to have bad days. I mean, I have an awesome God who loves me. I have a thousand other things to be thankful for (yes I am ending a sentence with a preposition). When I think of how hard I prayed so that God would make a way for me to come here (and He did!) it seems like I should never have those days when I just want to go home.

But I do. I have days when I cry for no reason at all. I am a teenage girl, do I need a reason?

Even on those days, though, I don't despair. I might be sad, I might in fact be pretty miserable, but I go where I need to go and I do what I need to do even when I really don't want to (look, another dangling preposition).

I can't see how I'm doing God's work. I don't know. He does. I am walking in the dark because Someone whom I love has taken my hand and asked me to follow Him. So I do.

1 comment:

Dernhelm said...

Bad days happen, but they are only bad because we have an idea of what a "good" day should be. The very fact that we have "good" days is a blessing to pull us through the bad ones... :)